Couples in my practice were excelling during our sessions. They connected, communicated, and delved deep into their issues with one another. Yet, all that progress seemed to unravel before they even reached the elevator banks in my building. Once they were on their own, the challenges resurfaced.

The struggle for my couples, like for many in therapy, is that it works well as long as there’s a therapist in the room refereeing. In the vacuum of the office space, everyone tends to bring their best selves forward. But despite my best efforts and theirs, my clients were not sustaining their progress.

I reached out to teachers, colleagues, and mentors, sharing my frustrations. Their collective response was, “Welcome to couples therapy.” For me, this was not a sufficient answer.

Determined to find a better solution, I decided to move beyond the conventional couples therapy techniques I had learned in school. Inspired by Harvard psychology professor Elvin Semrad, a pioneer of modern psychology, I began to let my clients be my textbooks. From that point, the five practices of Mindfulness, Parts of Self, The Narrative, Choosing, and Personal Responsibility naturally found their way into my work.

Suddenly, my clients had actionable practices they could use in their daily lives and relationships when things started to go off the rails.

To my surprise, these practices resonated not only with couples but also with individuals and even companies. They provided practical tools for navigating the complexities of relationships and personal growth outside the confines of therapy sessions.